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Satire for entertainment. Scores are game values, not population statistics or psychological measures.

Overwatch 2·Player Archetype
Ana

Ana.

“"Nano goes to whoever can end the fight, not whoever asks for it."”

LCTDUKPlayer Code
✕ Natural EnemyVS
Reinhardt

Reinhardt.

reinhardt

“"Shield up, shield down, charge. You have never once regretted the charge."”

★ Best Squad MateSQUAD
Lúcio

Lúcio.

lucio

“"Speed on, everyone moves, and somehow you're the one on the cart again."”

You keep five health bars, two cooldowns and one Nano running in your head at all times, and you decided who deserves it about thirty seconds ago. Not the one spamming for it in voice. The one who can actually close the fight. That's the whole job. You hold the sleep dart for eleven seconds because their tank hasn't ulted yet; you hold the grenade because somebody is going to get dived and it won't be you. You don't flame, you don't tilt, and you don't die out of position, which is exactly why nobody notices you until the game where you aren't there. Ana players don't get POTG. Ana players get the fight.

Slow burnL

You farm the lead. Patience is your weapon.

Risk managerC

You fold when others shove. That's why you're still alive.

Team anchorT

You live for the squad. Without them, the game loses its point.

Data drivenD

Win rates and timers are your religion.

Efficiency modeU

You don't need it to look good. You just need it to work.

Titanium tiltK

You get inted and keep playing. Teammates envy the calm.

Symptoms
  • 01You held the sleep dart for eleven seconds because their tank hadn't ulted yet.
  • 02Someone types "nano me." That's usually a reason not to.
  • 03You know every teammate's ult percentage. You just don't say it out loud.
  • 04Your worst games are the ones where you healed the most, and you can explain why.
  • 05You've never been in a POTG. You've decided that's a compliment.
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